My Love is Like a Red, Red Rose

Yes, I do get tired of being this depressed all the time.

My thanksgiving was lovely, filled with much less stress than is usual, and I am now back in Charlottesville. I discovered when I returned that I have kind of missed it, much like you would miss a puppy that you don't particularly like, but hey! it's a puppy. It's got charm, even if you hate it.

Here's a list in a blatant attempt to make you forget how strained that metaphor was:

Things My Mother Actually, Literally, Unironically Believes:

* You need a recipe to make a sandwich
* Sitting on the toilet seat will give you STDs
* The greatest danger from eating fresh fruit is not the pesticide but that "bugs might have sat on it"
* A single electronic appliance left on will burn the house down the instant the key clicks in the lock
* I should probably not be selling my body for science because the "rays" might hurt my unborn children. (Note: the "rays" in question were magnetic. Apparently I should also stay away from refrigerators and MRIs)
* My dad's hair has always been shorter than the hair of any boy I have ever dated.
* "I didn't fall off the back of the coconut bus last week!" is a saying in the common vernacular